Book Excerpt

But this wasn’t about the freedom of people who wouldn’t spit on them if they were on fire.

This was about their own survival. They had already killed her once. Next time, they might not revive her.

He brushed the bloody hair back from her face. “You need to think of your baby, honey. You’re lucky you haven’t miscarried already.”

Still, she held on to a blind hope he couldn’t even begin to fathom. “Darling will come for me. I know he will.”

Ture ground his teeth at her childish devotion. Not once since they’d been taken had it faltered. She honestly thought her boyfriend would come risk his own life and free them from this hellhole.

How he wished he could believe it, too. But he knew better. “Heroes aren’t real. They don’t come charging in to save their damsel. Trust me. They vapor trail off at the first sign of trouble, leaving you behind to face the invading army all by yourself, hoping they’ll burn the house down on top of you so they don’t have to see you again.”

“No, Ture. Those are selfish assholes. A hero doesn’t give up or give in. Ever. Darling told me he would crawl naked through hell, over broken glass, just to hold my hand, and I believe him.”

“Men will say anything to get into your pants, love. They don’t mean a word of it.”

She took his hand into hers and held it tight. “I’m sorry that you’ve never been in love with a man who really loved you back, Ture. But I’m telling you… I have seen what Darling and Maris have gone through for each other and they won’t leave us here. They won’t rest until they’ve rescued us. I know it.”

Ture opened his mouth, then closed it. There was no need in arguing. She had her belief and he had his. Maybe there had been a time in his life when he’d been so blinded by love that he, too, believed such bullshit. But too many years of being bitch-slapped by selfish dicks had taken its toll on him.

Not even his own family had ever been there when he needed them. So why should a stranger?

But in spite of his past, he wouldn’t take away the only thing that gave her comfort. Let her have her delusions while she could. He tightened his grip on her hand as his heart broke from the fear of losing her. Just like his sister.

Her interrogators had killed her today during her torture and then brought her back just so they could continue on with it.

Damn them all for it.

“I hope you’re right, sweetie,” he breathed against her hair. The last thing he wanted was for her to learn the harsh lessons that had been rammed down his throat. He wept for the loss of anyone’s innocence, especially when the loss was brutal. And deep down in a place he hated, was that last vestige of his own hope that she was right. That maybe, just maybe, there were people in the world worth something. Someone who could stand by you even in hell and not betray you.

“Zarya?”

“Mmm?”

“Tell me what it’s like to be held by someone who really loves you.”

Zarya swallowed hard. His request wrung her heart. While almost everyone she’d ever loved had been brutally murdered, Ture’s family had abandoned or disowned him. Because of that, he’d had an even harder time trusting people than she did. No matter what, he expected the people around him to turn on him.

The saddest part?

They always had.

“It’s the most wonderful thing you can imagine. There’s truly nothing like it.”

He sighed wearily. “I don’t know how you can take such a beating and still protect him.”

How could she not? Darling would do the same for her, and then some. She had no doubt. He really was that kind of man. “Did I ever tell you what my mother’s last words were to me?”

He shook his head.

“It was the morning when she went to confront my father’s killer. I asked her why she wouldn’t let one of the soldiers or gerents handle his rescue. And she said to me that all little girls, regardless of what they say, dream of a prince to come in and sweep them off their feet and save the day. But what no one ever mentions is that all little boys dream of a princess to do the same thing for them. But the problem with princes and princesses is that they’re spoiled and self-absorbed. They act in their own best interest. They don’t go after their loved ones to rescue them so much as they do it for their own vainglory, and to serve themselves. While she’d had many princes try for her hand, it was a king who claimed her heart. Unlike princes, kings take responsibility. They think of others instead of themselves and they will risk everything, even their very lives, for those they love. It is never about them, but rather about the ones they cherish most. They love to such depth that they would sacrifice all just to see their family smile. For every thousand princes, there is only one king. And such rare men do not deserve a useless princess who sits on her duff and orders others to worship her and do her bidding. Kings deserve queens- rare women who never flinch to do whatever it takes to keep their king safe. Women who have the courage to face any attacker and to rally to whatever challenge life throws at them. I will not sit here, she said to me, and let your father suffer while I hide in comfort. He risked his life to keep us safe and I will do no less for him. If it means my life, so be it. After all, he is my life and I don’t want to live without him. He deserves only my best and that’s exactly what he’s going to get, no matter the cost.”

Ture drew a ragged breath as the tears welling in her eyes choked him. “Though I never had the pleasure of meeting her, I love your mother. You know that, right?”

She squeezed his hand. “I love her, too. And I’ve tried every day of my life to do her proud and to be the queen she wanted me to be.”

He kissed the side of her head. “Sweetie, you are better than any queen. You’re a freedom fighter for our people and if your Darling is the king you think him to be, you will live to be an empress.”

“Then I shall be an empress. You will see.”

Ture smiled at the sincerity of her tone. How she could still believe in fairytales after everything life had tossed in her face, he had no idea. “Fine then. Just make sure when you’re empress, you find a queen for me.”

“I will.”

Ture tightened his grip on her as she went limp in his arms. Fear seized him until he assured himself that she was still breathing.

Thank the gods she wasn’t dead.

But she wouldn’t be able to survive much more. For that matter, neither would he. Every day got harder. They couldn’t break him because he knew nothing. They couldn’t break her because she was the most stubborn creature alive.

He admired that even though it made him want to wring her neck.

His one greatest hope was that her king was the man she’d convinced herself that he was. In his world, such men didn’t exist. They were fables and lies.

Still, he couldn’t stop imagining a world where people didn’t disappoint each other. A world where you could put your life and heart into the hands of another and not fear betrayal or hurt. A universe populated by people like Zarya…

You sound like an old woman.

He felt like an old man. Jaded. Cold. Aching. He licked at the blood on his lips and forced his thoughts away from things he knew were lies. Things that were impossible. People sucked. They were users and no matter how much you gave, they never stayed.

Closing his eyes, he prayed for death. And why shouldn’t he? He had no reason to live. Nothing to live for. Life just was.

And he was so tired now…

Book Synopsis

Setting: Ichidian Universe

SPOILER ALERT If you haven’t read Born of Silence, there are spoilers contained below.

One of the fiercest soldiers the Phrixians have ever produced, Maris Sulle has been an outsider the whole of his life. He grew up with a secret that cost him everything- His birthright, his family and his military career. In all his life, he’s only had one love and he has sacrificed his own happiness to see his best friend reunited with the woman he loves. But now that his good deed is done, he feels lost and adrift. Even though they do their best to include him in their new family, he’s once again on the outside looking in.

Ture has spent his life hiding from everyone around him while trying desperately to fit in. His family, the world, you name it. Badly hurt by everyone he’s ever known, he trusts no one except his own best friend. And honestly, he can’t understand why he trusts her. Nor can he believe her when she describes a loyalty between friends the likes of which he’s never seen.

But when he is in his darkest hour, he’s saved by a hero he thought only existed in novels. A man who is every bit as scarred and mistrusting as he is. One who has no interest in being dragged into another relationship with anyone.

Having spent his life as a living study of doomed relationships, Maris is well aware of the courtship and fiasco that invariably follows. Still, there is something about Ture he can’t resist. Something that won’t let him walk away when he knows he should.

But when old enemies return to threaten them both, they either have to stand together or die alone.

The Story Behind the Story

I can’t thank all of you enough for your enthusiasm for the League series. It means the world to me. Let me give you an update on what’s going on with it. The League is returning to its original publisher, St. Martin’s Press. Because I do so many books a year and I’m not the only author in the world :) we have to integrate those books into my schedule there (so that I’m not releasing 4 books at once and to allow other wonderful authors their due) and that is causing all my books except Styxx (Sept 3, 2013)and Inferno (April 9, 2013) to be shuffled a bit as we get the schedule into a release cycle that doesn’t physically kill me or frustrate readers with several books back to back, then nothing. The issue with Cloak & Silence is that it’s not a traditional release. It was originally supposed to be a small bonus story that quickly grew to be too big to be used as a simple bonus story. But it is not big enough to be a full novel. That is never a good thing since no one knew what to do with it. We were going to put it in an anthology, but it doesn’t fit storywise with any of the anthologies I’m working on and it’s too big for that, too. So we decided to release it as a new format ebook with the paper version coming later. But as with all new things, it’s taking a bit longer to get everything in order for its release (plus the serious E. Coli illness I’ve been battling and the fact that Styxx is making War and Peace look like a booklet didn’t help either). And now that Born of Fury is being moved, we wanted to make sure C&S wasn’t lost in the shuffle, and once it was pushed back, I wanted to go back in and expand a portion of it to address something I’m going to do in Born of Fury which I can’t expand on without a spoiler. But it’s something very cool that also makes the story longer. Please bear with me as we get everything in order and I do the revision. We’ve also had some very serious Hollywood interest in the League series and I’m hoping for some news on that front very, very soon.
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I was very blessed growing up to be exposed to a lot of very different people, from all kinds of religious and cultural backgrounds. Because of my own mixed heritage, I've always found other people's beliefs and backgrounds intriguing and I'm one of those people who judges no one. One of the beautiful things about the Cherokee culture is the belief that we are all from the Creator and the Creator made us different but gave us all the same heart that is capable of great love and acceptance, regardless of our pasts.

My mother's best friend was gay (as were my godparents) and I was raised around that community. Many of my friends and family are "family." In high school and college, I was the "safe" friend who would help my friends pass as straight so that they could hide who and what they were from others until they ready to let the world know the truth. Sometimes the world and their families surprised them by understanding. Other times, it didn't work out so well.

I will never forget the day I came home from work and while I was washing my uniform, my mother came in with a look I knew was a harbinger for something I didn't want to hear.

"I got a call from your friend's mama and I wanted to let you know that he blew himself to Jesus after dinner tonight. You might want to send flowers or something." My mother was never one for tact.

This was a boy I'd been extremely close to. One who had done some of the sweetest things for me imaginable. I'd have a really bad day and he'd show up at my drive-thru window with a present for no other reason that just to make me smile. I still have a little stuffed bear he brought to me on Valentine's Day because I'd told him that no one had ever given me anything for V Day.

To this day I weep whenever I think about the pain he went through and why he couldn't take it anymore. I always say that my characters aren't based on any real person. But I have to admit that there is a part of Maris that comes from my friend I still grieve for. He possessed that kind of loyalty and generosity of spirit, and was every bit as jaded. I miss his friendship to this day. No one should ever die so young and not for something so ridiculous.

Darling's character was born from the struggles I watched my friends all go through. Struggles all of us go through with trying to find our place in the world. Our fear of rejection and of being attacked because we don't follow the correct party lines. Darling, like Maris, has never changed in my mind. They are the same people now that I created in high school.

But while writing Born of Silence, Ture came on scene and I realized that I had finally found someone worthy of Maris. Someone who could love him as much as I do. So this is for the friends in my heart who are with me forever and for a friend I wish I still had.

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